Restorative Language for Transformation: Decolonize your Approach

Educators, we have been getting it wrong, confusing the use of affective statements that encourages centering of individualism, limits spaces for reflection, which misses opportunity for shared power, can harm relationships by creating shame; power dynamics can cause feeling expression to manipulate behavior.

What we need is transformational restorative language which  allows space to build and maintain relationships while centering student need/s, promoting self-agency and deepening critical thinking skills

Affective statements:	Transformational Restorative Statements  .
I/We +                                                       feeling word +                                      description of what happened +          explanation of expectation. *These are helpful for a healing harm situation where all participants have had time to process feelings and will be allowed to share.( Tier 2)	I + Observation + Care for person/community + May reference Shared Agreements + Reflective questions to understand the need/s (or function) of behavior. *Helpful in the moment for discreet check-ins, conversations and conferences. (Tier 1)
“I get angry when you talk and joke during my lectures” (Costello, Wachtel & Wachtel p 15)	“When someone talks and jokes during my lectures I wonder what it is they need to be successful, I wonder how to connect better with them to enjoy the information and learn, and I also worry other kids' learning will  be interrupted. What are your thoughts when you hear that??
“I was shocked to see you hurt Pete.” (Costello, Wachtel & Wachtel p 15)	In this classroom I value everyone’s safety, I need us to find a peaceful way to solve our conflicts.  What do you think is happening that is keeping you from keeping our shared agreements?
“I makes me uncomfortable when I hear you teasing Sandy. (Costello, Wachtel & Wachtel p 15)	“I was concerned about what you said to Sandy because I know you are a caring member of community.”